Diane Stavrum's blog

Thresholds of Dark Corners

March 7, 2012 by Diane | Edit

“It ís those between-places, the closing of one door and the indistinct threshold of you-know-not-what-yet that stir up debris usually settled along the dusty path of consciousness.”    Susan Guthrie

Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.  A. Einstein

There have been so many references to thresholds lately in my reading and thoughts that I wanted to comment briefly on the threshold of the darkness of suffering.  The illusion we have is that dark corners of understanding, the dark places of suffering from whatever it may be, tell us that we are without hope; we are not fully advanced as a “human being.”  It is during those very dark predicaments of life wherein the “dust” or debris of past illusions can get swept up into our limited focus we have at the time.

St. John of the Cross explained how light is really darkness. It is in a dark room when some light is entered that we see not light but dust and debris floating round in the mist. The unseen light reveals the debris, the dust. As light of understanding emerges ever so slightly in our dark moments of understanding or times of suffering, we don’t recognize the light at all rather we begin to see the dust and debris the illusions of our thinking, the illusions of our ill founded faith in the belief that we are to become more human.  The belief that being a true “human being” is the ultimate goal of the journey of life.  It is this belief that humanity at its best is the ultimate reality.  This  idea that  we are on a journey to become “human,”  or ” perfectly human,” has been generated by many theologians.

I see this is as an illusionary faith. St. Peter was expressed this kind of faith in his fellow mankind, when he refused to think or accept the fact that his great all powerful and wise Teacher would be put to death by the authorities especially the church authorities.  His All Wise Teacher tells him his faith was ill placed! He calls this kind of thinking as being associated with “Satan!”  The opposite of Life giving thinking.  He is pointing to Peter telling him  it isn’t in being more humanly kind, or in trusting in human kindness, wisdom, or justice, rather one’s faith is to be placed in the “unknown” the dark light of following the steps into suffering from the humanity to find the true Life eternal.  This is so obtuse to human thinking and still is today! A completer reversal of our modern prosperity, live to find happiness, et cetera.

This is place of darkness is a threshold we all are brought to many times over in our journey of living among our fellow humanity and world existence.  Do we let the True Light reveal the “dust’ of our illusionary faith and then repent?   Are willing to turn and let the suffering, the disgrace of following the kindness, the true justice of our Teacher be our guide?  Can the debris be cleansed and removed?  Jesus says Yes!  Follow him to the cross carrying  our own cross.

This is so against my humanity.  Only can God give me the Spirit to follow Him.  Come and get me oh True Light, reveal the debris in my life, let me follow into the night, but help me!

 

Wisdom hard for clever people to see or "the way of exchange" in words.

The following are some notes I made after some reading of C.S. Lewis which led to my cross reference remembrances from other sources.  I wrote them out here.  If you are like me these thoughts will lead you to other insights as you muse on these.

The last paragraph in the book  BY C.S. LEWIS UNTIL WE HAVE A FACE  ends;
" When the Divine voice says who she is…you are also Psyche…(complete soul)
I know now why Lord, why you utter no answer you are yourself the answer.
Before your face questions die away..what other answer would suffice? Only words, words lead out to do battle against other words."
 
Note the above wisdom as the same ending as in the Book of Job:

After God shows up Job responds: "…now I know who you are, and now I know who I am.  I am a man with empty headed words. I was the one who said foolish things like, I'll ask the questions and you give me the answers.
 Then comes chapter 42 verse 4 Job says:  " I had known you with the hearing of the ear, now I see you with mine own eye, and I fall down in dust and ashes."

Note a similar experience of knowing in a biography about Thomas Aquinas:
"…Thomas Aquinas just before his death as he was in chapel prone on floor after he just  finished his Theologica,  a brother Reginald watching swore a voice came form the crucifix, saying my son Thomas you have written well of me what would you have of me?  Thomas answers  "Only yourself Lord."   

This is the same idea again by C.S. Lewis his book teaches us to be similarly wise: "Only way to be relevant to your times is to be irrelevant to it." 

Further, C.S. Lewis, in the Great Divorce suggests:
  "…" I was always in heaven but didn't know it." and;
   "If we say our neighbor as in heaven we either would see them as a goddess or we would be turned away screaming that that was the most terrible nightmare we ever had."

Thomas Traherne said somewhere:
  "The world is a palace of infinite beauty but we don't see it."

St. Francis of Assisi,
 "If God grants you the beatific vision and someone poor knocks on your door answer it there is the Holy One."  paraphrased

Sisters of St. Mary's of Boston…they help people all the time…they see Jesus with all those they help. 

Wisdom hard for clever people to see.

I have been negligent in writing I know. So many life situations keeping me from writing. Now I'm going to try to write something more often just to do it. It isn't important that so few people ever read this blog that isn't my desire. If someone reads this blog and finds it edifiying I hope or interesting or something they can relate to that is good and fine. Oh here now it is so hard to write blind as my cat in son top of my lap and the laptop is slipping off and I amwriting blind. oops. Well later silent reader.

A poem for Autuum

Assurance

You will never be alone, you hear so deep
a sound when autumn comes. Yellow
pulls across the hills and thrums,
or in the silence after lightning before it says
its names — and then the clouds’ wide-mouthed
apologies. You were aimed from birth:
you will never be alone. Rain
will come, a gutter filled, an Amazon,
long aisles — you never heard so deep a sound,
moss on rock, and years. You turn your head —
that’s what the silence meant: you’re not alone.
The whole wide world pours down.

—William Stafford

Comments about "the Way" in Acts chapter 24 from A Tobias Stanislas Haller & me

I follow Tobias and his comments in my Google Reader and on Aug 18 he posted  No Way to Run..."    He begins talking about the "Way" that St. Paul entitles the "the followers of the Good News"     I found it challenging, provoking, fun and enlightening.  Indidently, I agreed completely, his comment about the political pundits speaking before the speakers are even finished.
Here is his post in complete quote.  My short comments are at the bottom of this post.

 [you can find his original post here In Godward Direction with comments from others. Good! I liked "whole new shift-load of paradigms" line also!]

No Way to Run...
by Tobias Stanislas Haller

2 people liked this - you, and 1 more

"Every time I come upon the passage from the 24th chapter of Acts (appointed for the Daily Office today) I am reminded of the resonance between references to the early church as “the Way” to the Rabbinic concept of Halakah: the law as a Way in which one walks.

This struck me particularly this morning because I have been thinking a great deal about the dangers of ideology, and how an ideology or a theory (properly understood as a “way of seeing”) can actually prevent one from seeing a deeper reality. The phenomenon is known as “perceptual set” in some circles, “paradigm blindness” in others. Put briefly, the way you see the world can come to dominate what you see. I referred in an earlier post to the old saying, “If your only tool is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.” If as Thomas Kuhn suggests, we need a shift in our paradigms in order to see changes in reality, it seems to me that across the board in many areas of our lives we need a whole new shift-load of paradigms!

For both in church and state these days ideology is at the forefront and reality has become deeply shrouded in veils of preconception. From conversations on climate change to sexuality, the debt crisis to marriage equality, the verbiage — I cannot in good conscience call it conversation for the most part — appears to be dominated by ideologies and theories rather than fact. (I cannot be the only one who is appalled to see what has become of journalism these days: and there are times I long for a supply of bricks next to my easy chair to toss through the television screen when a “news” program cuts from an actual live speech by a world leader to a panel of pundits even before the speech is finished!) Whatever reality there may be is cocooned in layers of opinion, and there is no sign of a butterfly emerging. Not a chrysalis, but a mummy.

But back to Saint Paul and the rabbis, and this idea of the faith being a “way” — and of course acknowledging that the Jewish tradition had long understood various “ways” as being either wicked or good, depending. (See Psalm 1!)

The major contrast I want to note is the difference between a way and a place. In this case I am particularly thinking about how Paul’s alleged insult to the Temple (in fact baseless) led to his having to defend this new Way. And what is ironic is that the old Way of rabbinic Halakah itself turned out to be the means by which this form of Judaism was able to survive the destruction of the Temple — a Temple which God appears, from the early record, not actually to have wanted all that much; God preferring the Tent and Tabernacle, or the terrifying Chariot, to the petrified establishment on the hill of Zion. (Ezekiel sees a new Temple, Revelation assures us there is no Temple in the New Jerusalem. Take your pick.)

So it appears to me that Christianity itself could well be seen as an emergent non-Temple-based Judaism (among the many Judaisms of the first century) that gets detached and takes on a life of its own; much as rabbinic (rather than Temple) Judaism continued the life of that faith because it had come to see the living out of the Way of God was not dependent upon an external institution but an internalized (both individually and corporately) Way of life under the guidance of a transcendent God.

So does this have anything to say to our current ecclesiastical troubles — say, in relation to a proposed Anglican Covenant or the Indaba Process as “ways” of working? Or to our civic, national, or international concerns — government as institution or government as way of being?
Discuss among yourselves and report back!"
                    - by Tobias Stanislas Haller BSG

My Comment:
Tobias seems to have a very discerning mind. The quote of Thomas Kuhn made me laugh out loud.

I like example especially of Ezekiel "seeing a New Temple" and the "Revelation of Jesus to John" as "no temple in the new Jerusalem." Take my pick Tobias says. I think both are viable. Could we explain it that Ezekiel was prophesying the "new Temple" as the "Body of Christ?" and John's vision(prophecy) is of the whole New Jerusalem of another dimension of Life all together. So maybe it isn't a "take you pick" after all but both prophecies are true; one has been or is being fulfilled in the Church Age (as we call it) and the other has yet to be fulfilled.
Good food for thought and prayer, I found.

TWO LOVELY GIFT IN TWO WEEKS

FIRST GIFT

On a morning daily walk with Suzi, my Shih Tzu doggie, here in The Shores, we crossed paths with a young mother pushing a stroller along with her little son who was my guess about four. The little boy lifted up his hand holding a little bright yellow toy semi-truck smiling and saying…”see?” I commented “isn’t that a beauty!” As they continued walking closer he stopped and held it up again. I smiled. Then surprising both me and his mother who looked astonished, he took two steps toward me and slowly put his arms all around me and then just held me tight! It was amazingly tender! His mother’s mouth dropped and then smiled proudly and I was smiling as our eyes met in the joyful wonder of it all. He held me for a full minute at least pressing his head next to me. I was SO loved! His mother smiled and then urged him to move along. He skipped along and looked back smiling and holding up his truck again. I was in love!

SECOND GIFT

This week I was on a daily long fitness walk with Suzi on the Bay Walk just next to The Shores where we live, when an elder woman with her sit-down stroller was sitting on the parapet resting I presumed. She commented immediately on how Suzi was so beautiful and began to ask me questions of her age, breed etc. Which most often people do if they aren’t running or on a walking sprint. After answering the general questions and expecting to move on our walk this woman began sharing more personal things about herself; she was from Portland, lived in a rest home, and went on talking about that a bit, at which point I decided I better sit down with her on the parapet and listen. She continued by telling me she had been diagnosed with MS several years ago but she is now 86 and she believes healed. She explained she was a “charismatic” and continued with information that she was here visiting her daughter who lived just over the way-she pointed about half mile up the walk-and proudly that she was the senior vice president of management operations at Kaiser Permanente. She continued telling me of her “charismatic” life experiences. To her great dismay she has found people who are adamantly against the Catholic religion. She told me a story where four Catholic priests (one her priest) came to her unit/home to ask her to pray in tongues over each one of them. She was very moved and did so as they sat in pray among her many icons in her prayer corner of her living room. She spent more time telling me the details of her experience seeing a boy who had scoliosis healed right before her eyes. After those stories she moved closer to me to ask me to hold her hand then gave a beautiful prayer for me and then I for her. She said, “did you feel the electricity in our hands?” I nodded and said I did! I did. I often have this sensation in my hands while praying with someone. It is a small thing but a reminder of the power of love and kindness to say the least of the mystery of how God works in our lives. We were both moved and pleased that among the many we had this little visit next to the Bay. It was a blessing for us both.

That was my first experience in both cases of a total stranger and in odd or unlikely circumstances giving a me a gift of such heart-felt love. I am truly blessed!

It reminds me of Dame Julian’s famous comment, “Nothing is done by luck or by chance, but
everything by the foreseeing wisdom of God.” (Julian of Norwich)

And “All things shall be well, all things shall be well, all manner of things shall be well.” (Julian of Norwich)

Follow up on Hawk post

So what was the message? Well I haven’t deciphered that as yet. It seems I either missed it or just don’t get it. Anyway I should think I would recognize a “message” wouldn’t you think?
If anything the message is to “Stay the course you are in good hands.” So I will accept that wholeheartedly!

What does it mean when a hawk comes to you?

What does it mean when a hawk comes to you?
 I've had hawk fly right by my deck (very unusual) and now he sat on my deck post and watched me take a picture of him; I was so excited thus the blur. I'm just happy I got this shot of him with my camera.

 

Humm!  Not that everything that happens to me is significant but I thought, I wonder what it means to the indians or folklore people?  So I asked the above question online and found these answers:
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
The hawk is a messenger bird. Usually when we see a hawk it means to pay attention because a message is coming to you. Hawks represent clear sightedness, being observant, our far memory and guardianship. They also bring courage, wisdom, illumination, creativity and truth. Hawks give us the ability to see the larger picture in life. They can help you to overcome problems and make wise use of opportunities. How does this all happen?

Each animal carries what we call 'medicine'. What I have written above is the hawks medicine. When the same animal keeps coming to you in real life or in a dream, it is bringing it's medicine to you.

You will be brought a message soon, a good one, to let you know you are on the right path. And whatever problems you are wrestling with, you will solve because hawks medicine has been given to you.

I know this because I am a traditional Shawnee (American Indian) and I've learned these things are true. Many 'interesting ' answers you got so far though. Good luck to you.

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
Blessings, blessings and more blessings. You have been blessed. Give thanks.

Edit: In response to your email: Sorry, didn't mean to be so vague . . . Hawk is a messenger of the Creator/Great Spirit/God. The Hawk wants you to be aware the the Creator is speaking to you. Take notice. Only you know what the message is. . . in fact, you already know (even if you don't realize it yet). God is sending you a message. . . but it is for you. Be aware; take notice. (People often think this is a negative, as if "awareness" is negative; it simply means not to be oblivious to your surroundings, dreams, etc).

Personally, I have always given thanks to the hawk whenever I see him/her. I once found a hawk feather and felt blessed. But the most dramatic experience happened after moving to Green Bay, WI from the reservation. I had an attached porch that was open on two side and closed on two sides. Had a table on the porch. Not the place hawks hang out. But one morning--6am--my son and I were leaving the house. He was a bit behind me when I stepped out onto the porch. I had almost reached the steps when a hawk (who had been sitting on the table) flew from the table, touched my head/hair and then flew straight away. My son who was behind me saw that it was a hawk. As I looked up from being hit in the head, I could also see it was a hawk. I was verbalizing Thank you Thank you even before I checked to see if I was missing part of my scalp--I wasn't--not a scratch--but my hair was messed up. I immediately knew that the Great Spirit was trying to tell me something but I had been too distracted to hear it/see. The Hawk hitting me on the back of my head was like God hitting me upside the head saying: wake up, pay attention! Every morning for days after the hawk sat on the table on my porch. One morning, I got a call from a neighbor saying: you won't believe this, but a hawk is sitting on your porch." Of course I believe it, it had been sitting their every morning for days. I started taking note of my dreams, did a ceremony and figured out what the message was. Once I figured it out, the hawk stopped coming to the porch. But, ever time I see a hawk, I smile and give thanks.
Source(s):
personal experience

Serious matters to consider. Decisions to make.
    •    3 years ago

 drcurtis...
If you believe in animal totems (as typical in some American Indian traditions), most associate hawks and kestrels with WISDOM. So perhaps you have a wise insight into some of your life changes, so trust yourself and go with it.
    •    3 years ago

 Majeska
Good sign! Hawk can pick out the details in the "big picture". If you are going through changes, be aware of how the details of the change fit into the "big picture". What may seem to be a big deal on a small scale may not be so overbearing in the broad scope of things. Never hurts to step back and survey the landscape when traveling into new territory.
    •    3 years ago

End of quotes.

What do you think?  Any other suggestions?

Musings on Gender Faults

May 31, 2011 by Diane

My earnest and kindest feelings to the gentlemen that read this and find it smarts.  If it does that to you then you aren’t among those whom I am discussing here.  You may have actually seen this kind of attitude yourselves among your peers.

Gender Faults:
Too often a helpful suggestion from a woman to a man results in a friendly “shine off.”  They just don’t like accepting help, especially if it is a mechanical idea from a woman no matter how small the incident.  Sometimes it is accepted but reluctantly I suspect.  What makes me say this: two men (50ish) were trying to open the gas cap on a motorcycle (real beautiful chrome) just at the base of my outside staircase.  As I was leaving my staircase I stopped to say hello, watched politely seeing the problem; walked on with my dog; came back to go up the stairs and one guy with a hammer was pounding away on a screw driver trying to budge the beautiful chrome cap to open.  I couldn’t keep quiet, so I shyly as possible said, I have some WD40 (a spray lubricant) I have found works wonders with a stuck cap you can use.  Neither guy looked up. Together they said no,  “it’s stuck, thanks.”  In other words the tone was nice but “bug off chick.”   So a few moments later I could see from my upstairs window they managed to unscrew the cap after banging at it with ferocity, which I’m sure  badly scratched the chrome.  It just needed lubricant!  Maybe now you see what I mean.  Okay it could be the male ego with a motorcycle thing,  I don’t know.  But such rudeness for such a small suggestion!  At other times the insult, although probably not intended as one,  isn’t so obvious but nonetheless it is very clear.  The male response generally seems to be more “self” focused than “other” focused;  more concern for one’s own appearance than aware of the effect of comments on women.  After all their only women and shouldn’t be interested in “male” activities.
To even up this muse of gender faults post, I would like to quote this:

JOKE OF THE MONTH
“A young man, who did not get married, dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, he sees two lines filled exclusively with men. The line of his left is a half-mile long and packed three wide, with a sign in front saying: All Wimps and Hen-Pecked Husbands Register Here. To his right, on the other line, is one man standing alone under a sign that says: All Others Register Here. So the new guy walks up to the lone man in that line and asks, “Why are you standing in this line?” And the man replied, “Listen, buddy, my wife told me to stand here and I AM NOT MOVING!””

on the Catholic City Email monthly message.  If you are interested you can sign up: http://www.catholicity.com/message/   or go to the website: http://www.catholicity.com/

Casual Thoughts while sitting in the sun

May 26, 2011

The days go by, the weeks slip by, the afternoons seem to go by so quickly.  I relish having breakfast (coffee) in the early morning sun; I love sitting and reading or resting in the afternoon sun coming in my living room or sitting on the deck.  Those precious hours all seem to melt away and then they come back, and then they are gone again.  Time is a funny thing; time passes but joys are the same.  The next moment seems like all the others.

I’ve been reminded that calories aren’t as significant in losing weight as it is to not eat carbohydrates in my chosen food.   To make a chart showing the percentage of carbohydrates, protein, and fat in the food that one has eaten has proven to be quite educational.  My favorite bananas are high in carbs for example. I now am using LoseIt.com as an aid in following the nutrients in the foods I eat.  If you have trouble as I do in losing weight you might find this free help site very helpful.  In fact it's terrific even if you arn't losing weight, as a means of watching you weight, nutrients, and tallies of calories.   I've only been on this regieme now for less than a month and the progress is up and down.  I'm adjusting the foods of choice as I learn that my protein level needs to be higher than my carbohydrate level.  This is true for me anyway.

"Puzzles and mind games help to lessen the possibility of dementia or Alzheimer’s disease."  This statement came from the Alzheimer's Weekly."